“The human being changes, for better or for worse, it transforms. My work analyzes and interprets the study of this change. We have inside the magnificence, beneath the surface, the beauty. This is my concept of art.”
In my artistic research there is the world of childhood, a metaphor of origin and infinite happiness, of preparing for life without the awareness of living it.
When I was a child, learning was normal for me. When I got grades, learning was mandatory. Before an exam, learning was essential. When they gave me prizes, it seemed too much, I had done only what was normal, due, fundamental. I don't deserve anything.
I cannot receive rewards, gratifications. I feel a sense of inadequacy on me, I'm afraid I'm not enough. I am aware that I can always make a mistake, take that step that leads me to become "good" at something no longer leaves me room for error, I am welcomed by the world and I feel a nullity in comparison. I should enjoy the moment more, even the mistake. I put a spoke in the wheel to tell myself later that I could not do it. This sense of inadequacy pushes me not to internalize my successes, to give credit to luck, to the facilitated starting conditions. It is I who have put myself in the game, it is I who am still doing it, it is I who have chosen this. I have to allow myself the possibility of making mistakes, if only to realize that I could do the right thing and that, if I do it next time, I will have to accept it and smile. I deserve everything. I have to learn to accept and let what happens to me flow. I have to welcome him and not resist. I deserve everything that happens to me.
The importance of not talking
I have to learn to be sad. I have to learn that there is time for everything. I have to start coping with sadness. I must be melancholy if I feel like it. I have to learn to take my time. I have to learn to listen to myself. I have to learn to be aware of my emotions. I have to balance my emotions. I have to learn not to hide. I have to learn not to speak.
My work is born from interior and fluid images, in continuous movement, which I decipher and transfer to multimedia means. The choice of multimedia support, and video in particular, allows me to express the fluidity of concepts which, in order to manifest themselves, need movement.
Time is the place where these changes take place, which welcomes this research and, at the same time, is part of it.
My video talks about a walk, alone, to look for our own way to live. Thoughts is overlapping, breathing becomes laboured, the heart rhythm follows the steps ... or maybe it's the opposite. Sound is an important element in the composition: any single thought is recorded with the rhythm of my heart. The rhythm of the heart berths the moment to the reality while the thoughts is keeping going in total freedom. This work is a reflection on the building of an human being and of his soul. After an initial sense of abandonment, it arrives the moment in which you can understand you have only yourself, and you are enough. You are the only one that can choose everything in your life!
My work is born from interior and fluid images, in continuous movement, which I decipher and transfer to multimedia means.
The choice of multimedia support, and video in particular, allows me to express the fluidity of concepts which, in order to manifest themselves, need movement.
An equal and opposite reaction corresponds to each thought. Stronger, less strong. More stable, less stable. More haughty, less haughty. have you ever got that feeling? I want to go. I want to think. I want to reflect. I want to meditate. What's inside me? Heaps of disconnected thoughts. I can create my world from these, from a series of thoughts that lead me somewhere.
Growing up one loses and at the same time one acquires experience, made up of emotions, knowledge, dreams, reality, imagination which, as they evolve, change and expand.
I accept myself. Even if something I've done angers me, I accept myself. How do I explain this ambivalence? I am ambivalent. I can not do anything about it. It is not a mistake. I don't have to feel inferior, never up to par. It is not wrong. I'm not broken. I am whole, strong, enveloping.
I want to live to the end. I want to immerse myself completely. Everything that has been there is and will be there. I don't want to delete it, this is because I am this, I don't want to delete it. Deleting is useless. I don't want to erase moments from my past, anchor them in my interior without telling them to anyone anymore so as not to think about them. When they come out, it's an explosion of memories that saddens me even more. I don't want to get over it, still getting entangled in it. But I want to accept them. If I think about it, it will still be with a different emotion from the one I experienced, so it is no longer true. I'm not saying wrong, but not her anymore. And if I look back on it with nostalgia, sadness, anger… it will be different again.I want to accept and go further. I have to accept and go further. I have to think about the reason that makes me feel this way, but not about the fact that I feel this way. A thing said directly does not have the same strength as what people are forced to discover for themselves (S. Kubrick) Accepting the past, not being ashamed, has immense strength.
Prize Ribbon (1)
Describe your image
Like blocked. Chained in being too kind. I feel guilty for my life. Everyone tells me I'm very pretty and smiling, but I don't want to be like that. Fragments, my life. Important and not important fragments. My soul kicks, I don't. I can't, I feel guilty about my life.
Everyone tells me I'm very pretty and smiling, and I want to be like that.
The installation is one with the surrounding environment: it is made of 4 projections that will appear central on 4 canvases and which will fade on the walls. It will be done like this because I want to leave the viewer confused and involved. It tells about 4 separate phases of existence but all united by freedom, the backbone of this work. This is also evident from the title: wandering. Isn't it one of the most intimate and, therefore, free moments? Break your chains, do something as if you have no limits, swim, run madly without direction, slide non-stop for the sake of playing, walk aimlessly to understand and understand you, live. The sound is unique and unsettling. The song, Daisy, is the breaking song between the world and the extra-world, for me like a personal and intimate world. The song is rendered by an automaton and not by a child. An automaton has no age, gender, religion, ... These screeches initially annoy but, after a while, it seems to unite the 4 works in a unique fluidity. Entering this room you are immediately annoyed by this noise but also intrigued by this work. In this way you can connect the 4 videos immediately. Anyone can connect them through his experience. Happiness, courage, self-determination.
Mistakes are part of my personal improvement path. I shouldn't let myself be paralyzed by the expectations that others have or, even worse, that I have about myself. “Man must be able to choose between good and evil, even if he chooses evil. If this choice is taken away from him, he is no longer a man, but a clockwork orange. " I have to be on my side, I have to look after myself, I have to pamper myself.
A triler of my own life could describe that I am wrong. Admitting a mistake is the most honest and courageous thing I can do. It makes me feel human, in the midst of so many humans. It makes me feel better, it makes me feel undressed but it makes me start over. It is the only thing that keeps me going, even in front of myself. It makes me realize that I am human. I consider a mistake made by someone else less serious than by me, however. I reassure him, it could happen to everyone, really. I feel it is part of the life process. Why? Because I know myself more deeply and I know I could not be wrong. I know I could do it. It is so difficult for me to tell myself that I was wrong by focusing on the error and thinking that the rest is a process; we are wrong, it is part of life. It is hard to think of life as a process and not as a goal. For example, a mistake made by me because of my right hand makes me angry, a lot. It makes me feel exaggeratedly inept, much lower than the bar that the world seems to have. A physical mistake is unforgivable. But I get angry at myself and then I can't get back on my feet, what if maybe I go wrong? I make a drama out of a tiny thing. My idea of failing then turns to rock, becomes heavy and obstructs part of my vision of the world. It traps me. And I'm not trying to avoid pointing out how inept I am. And I'm stuck, and I don't choose anymore to never make mistakes, which I'm sure will happen. And this expands like wildfire, no longer makes me choose anything.
In a cell he was and remains, until he finds completeness: the sixteenth part. Attempting the recomposition of one’s being: this is the fulcrum. The only fixed point of which he still has freedom is his mouth, from which he continues to hear the sound. The silence of the lost identity and the opposing noise are marked by the rhythm of the metronome. Also incomplete, aimed at 3/4 to touch.
The whole installation is in a certain sense tautological, it contains all the elements of the dream fact.
In my work there are 4 elements:
- The story, consisting of the main video
- Isolation from the real world, the coating in a PVC cover
- The aspiration to extreme freedom, consisting of the ceiling projection
- The dreaming self, which materializes in a flowery silhouette. The quote to “Bunch of
flower a day, flower for freedom .” Ai Weiwei. The meaning is easy to read: nothing is created, nothing is destroyed, everything turns into a dream.
I tell the taste of dreams, I describe in this way what I struggle to express in words,
the moving image is my medium.
They are my dreams, imbued with me, my life, and free my desires, my fears, my
emotions. I laugh, I savor the tears, I bare my body, I jump and pirouette to bare
the wounds of my past and the achievements of my experience, I let myself be taken by my dream. I wanna try.
Stay still. Do not risk. Do not hurt. Don't live. Being afraid of living. Wanting to prepare myself first.
Scared of never being enough. Scared of not having ideas, of not being up to par. Scared of living. So get stuck, in front of everything you do. Scared of not being able to do it. Scared of not being quite right with the rest of the world. Scared of not being enough, neither for you nor for others. Scared of imperfection. To the point of becoming an obsession. Scared of not being competent enough.